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The Nuclear War Between Jocks and Nerds

10/30/2016

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Please welcome my latest guest blogger, H. G. Sansostri.

H.G. - Harri - is an author with two published books to his name already. I say "already," because Harri is only 14 years old, but writes with the maturity of someone double his age. 

I gave his novel, The Chronicles Of Derek Dunstable, 4-stars in my Amazon review. As I am thoroughly recommending it to everyone, I'm not giving away the plot at all. Al
l I’ll say about the storyline is that it involves a thoroughly modern and unique take on zombies – well, I’ve not come across this type of zombie/monster/creature before, anyway. It’s a truly innovative idea.

It's also written in the present tense, which is extremely difficult to achieve, but makes a book much fresher and vibrant when successfully accomplished. And HG pulls it off effortlessly. 

Check out his Amazon page here: 

https://www.amazon.co.uk/H.G-Sansostri/e/B00IVGC18E/
Harri's blog post has nothing to do with his life as a writer...but is something he feels very strongly about - the nuclear war between jocks and nerds. Harri, over to you.
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I am not one for Sports. I’m not good at shooting or defending in football, bowling in cricket, dribbling in basketball or doing any complicated tricks.

I am pretty good at dodgeball and handball, where the fear of taking a powerful shot in football to the face is lessened. I am really good at goal keeping in handball and keeping myself in the game in dodgeball. However…

When I watched ‘Good Morning Britain’ a few days ago, they were having a discussion about competitive parents during Sports Day. They had a woman who came on and said  ‘How kids must learn to push themselves to become the best they can be and also be competitive with one another’.

​Now here, I totally agree with her. Sports do make us want to do our best and come first. We can’t lie and say winning doesn’t feel amazing, it does. I mean, we try not to feel bad when we lose, but we feel a little bad, don’t we? that’s just simple, plain, human behaviour!
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She also mentioned that  children can show their parents their skills and achievements through sports and be proud. Now that made me slightly frustrated, not because of her comment, but because of what primary schools are doing.

Kids who are good at sports get a whole day to show off their talents, yes Sports Day,  yet some kids who are good at Science ,Maths or English only get recognition of this  through a five minute parent/teacher consultation and an End of Year report with just a paragraph on what they have obtained academically throughout the year.

There is no recognition from your classmates  especially if you are an academic and enjoy certain subjects, whilst the kids who excel in sport have lots of respect from their peers in their class? I respect and admire the ‘sporty kids’ but I also respect the ‘clever kids’ too?

​We are just not on a ‘level playing field’ excuse the pun!

We get loads of rubbish from others in our year as well. This has happened a lot to me being a ‘nerd’ or a ‘keeno’ (people who are really enthusiastic about school or ‘keen’ as they call it in my form). Just because we are smart and aren’t as good as them in sports instantly makes us a target.  Its either that we stick up for ourselves or they pick on us for being weaker than them, well that’s what they like to think?  
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I don’t get as much hassle as other ‘nerds’ do, but it still feels awkward or hurtful when one of those popular boys just ‘disses’ you and everyone joins in and goes crazy.

Here is an analogy…

It’s like those Japanese cartoons Pokemon. All the popular ones are the main characters, with lots of detailed animation and personality. Yet, we, ‘the nerds’ are the background characters, the ones whom only have an outline, a face and body, with no particular details at all?

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My point is, if you really want to help cut down on bullying, start with levelling the playing field between the ‘nerds’ and ‘jocks’.

Maybe then we can start feeling more confident with being good at what we are all good at and know we will get rewarded equally and fairly. Is that ever going to happen?  I don’t think so!

It shouldn’t be all about sports achievements  or all about academics but there should be a mutual respect and balance for both fields.  
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Create In Crete. Well, It'd Be Rude Not To, Wouldn't It?

10/18/2016

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What’s that old saying: “Manners maketh the man”?

As Susie B nearly always beats me at table tennis I need to grasp every opportunity to gain an advantage. So when she offered me the chance to replay a point on our recent holiday in Crete, I grasped it with both hands.

But what led up to that scenario? In my opinion, an ageing Italian’s total and utter disregard for anyone or anything other than himself, that’s what. What, other than sheer ignorance, leads this 70+ year-old Italian making a beeline for the outdoor bar by taking a shortcut between me and the table tennis table? Not only during a game, but in the middle of a friggin’ point. 

Picture the scene: my style of play leads me to hit defensive shots from about six feet behind the table, then rush in to smash winners from close range. So, what the hell? I’m moving in for the kill when he wanders into my path, and is squarely between me and the table when my forehand smash would undoubtedly take Susie B out.

And he’s not even apologetic…just meandering on his way with barely a grunt. Unfortunately he isn’t alone in his thoughtlessness. So many others are equally devoid of basic manners. My Mum and Dad brought me up to think of others and to be courteous in my everyday activities.

For example, I’ll never block a pavement, or aisle in a shop. I’ll never suddenly stop while walking anywhere without looking behind me first. I’ll never talk to anyone without a “please” or “thank you.” And I’ll never do or say anything to deliberately hurt, offend or upset anyone. Basically, I always treat other people exactly how I’d like them to treat me. I’m sure you feel the same (in fact, I can see you nodding your head right now) – but do you think we’re in the minority? I should say we definitely are.

People say it’s the just the way of the world now, and people are what the world has made them. Yes, maybe so. But the world is what people have made IT. 

Hey, d'you know what? That wasn't the only incident on my holiday that got me thinking - something else sprang to mind. This one was in the hotel bar (with one of their MASSIVE local brandies in hand) while watching Norway play Germany in a 2018 World Cup Qualifier match.

Arsenal favourite Mesut Özil turned out for Germany, and when I saw his name on the back of his shirt it got me thinking. The umlaut – the two dots above the o –signifies a missing letter, usually an e. So his full surname would be Oezil. Why don’t we do that in English, do away with the letter e altogether and put an umlaut over the preceding letter? A simple additional key on our keyboards could insert the umlaut over any letter, just as the shift key does to make a capital.

English is quirky enough to take this in its stride. After all, a language that pronounces cough as coff, and plough as plow, has a head start in idiosyncrasy. As Homer Simpson would say: “D’oh.” Or should that be “Dough?”

So who’s with me on creating the SOEBUIK pressure group? That’s Scrap Overrated E Because Umlaut Is King. And if any clever Dick suggests that acronym should be SÖBUIK I’ll politely tell you where said umlaut can be not so delicately placed.

Which all goes to remind me, do you remember the days when “encyclopaedia” was written with the a and e joined up in some peculiar way? I think the widespread use of keyboards instead of pens finally did away with that typical English eccentricity.

Although I’m always working (my wife still doesn’t believe I’m working when I’m staring out of the window), I wouldn’t swap a writer’s life for royalties on every non-umlauted u and o in the world.  

SOEBUIK aficionados unite – may the ö and ü force be with us. 


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5 Reasons to go Barefoot

10/10/2016

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My guest blogger today is Hayley Gillard, who can often be found barefoot in the Great Outdoors. 

"Yes, a lot like you, Stewart," I hear you cry.

Deffo. 

But the difference being, Hayley is a professional. I'm a mere amateur when it comes to going barefoot.

Which is why I invited Hayley to explain, from a professional's point of view, why having bare feet is good for our bodies and our minds.

Over to Hayley:
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Going barefoot is brave. “What if I get a splinter”, “It’s too cold”, “People might look at me funny”, “My feet are ugly”. Just some of the responses I get from people who come along to my monthly Barefoot Club. Brave people who end up smiling, running free and enjoying using all their senses to really feel at peace with themselves and nature. Barefoot Club is a social meet-up in Otley, West Yorkshire for people who want to try something new, de-stress in nature and meet like-minded people.

I’m an Ecotherapist. I work outdoors helping people who are stressed out, overwhelmed and exhausted. You can find me hiking up a mountain whilst doing a life coaching session, teaching someone mindfulness whilst toasting a marshmallow or meditating with a group of stressed out employees as part of my employee wellness packages.

I also run a social enterprise called Wild Goose Wellbeing and we use nature as therapy to help people improve their emotional health. We do things like campfire cooking, natural art and craft and bushcraft and we also lose our shoes and socks and explore. We explore our physical location and the beautiful surroundings, but we also explore our senses, our emotions and meet a load of new people too!
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I’ve been barefoot walking for many years now. Not everywhere (you may get a few too many looks if you walk through your local shopping centre!) but when I’m out walking the dog, hiking over the moors or climbing hills and dales? Absolutely - I love it.

Most of us have gone barefoot (on the beach or in the garden) before, and we probably all spent lots of our childhood barefoot. But, as adults we often see it as a bit woo woo or even dangerous. Whilst I’m not advocating you remove shoes from your life completely (I LOVE SHOES – especially gorgeous heels when I’m out for dinner), what I am proposing is that you spend some more quality time baring your soles (pun intended – sorry)!

I want to tell you 5 reasons why I think you should go barefoot more! 
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  1. It’s physically better! – Our feet weren’t made for shoes. When we developed as a species a very long time ago we didn’t wear shoes.​There are a lot confines to shoes, our toes can’t spread properly, they over-sweat, they rub and get sore, and they are prodded and pushed in ways they don’t want to go. This is especially important for children as they are growing. Being barefoot can help to improve gait, growth and muscle tone. Being barefoot also means we are using our muscular and skeletal system in the ways nature intended.
2.  You feel free! – As soon as you take off your shoes and socks your senses are heightened immediately. You become more responsive and receptive. This is fantastic from a mindfulness perspective. Because you are now aware of where you are treading you become much more aware of the world around you and therefore much more present in that moment. Being barefoot is also great for balance and focus as you concentrate on the path ahead. Plus, a bit of fresh air (or mud!) around toes that have been cooped up all winter, feels incredible and it gives you a bit of a spring clean!

3.  It feels silly! - Yes, this really is a benefit! You may get a few odd looks, so what!? This is less of an issue if you go barefoot walking with friends as you will just laugh it off. I’ve got to the stage now where I encourage people to join in rather than feel awkward about their stares! But seriously – feeling silly and then laughing about it is great! It’s good to laugh at life’s awkward moments, we spend far too long being serious and stressed out. Laughing is refreshing, it makes you feel good, releases those feel good endorphins and what a great talking point to share next time someone asks you what you got up to at the weekend!

4.  You develop great relationships – People are intrigued when someone is barefoot! It’s amazing! People are either flabbergasted that you are barefoot when it’s cold/muddy/raining/on your own or they are seriously impressed and wish they could join you! Invite them! Who knows, you may meet your future best friend/husband/wife! I go barefoot walking with friends and family and it’s great to start conversations based on the present moment rather than asking about someone’s (often stressful) week! Our Barefoot Club is designed to be social, fun and about meeting new people. What a great shared common interest!

5.  It reduces stress – Not only is being outdoors, trying something new, meeting new people and being barefoot great for our wellbeing but barefoot walking actually reduces stress levels. You have lots of acupressure points on your feet which are linked to anxiety, stress and mental wellbeing and walking on your bare soles stimulates all of these. Our feet have over 200,000 nerve endings in them, as we feel the ground, its texture and temperature we become much more aware of the earth beneath us and can feel grounded and calmer.    

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They’re just five of the reasons for going barefoot! I could go on and on! It’s so good for your body, mind and soul that I can’t think of any reasons why NOT to do it!

I do sometimes get asked by people who have fears around hurting their foot or picking up some nasties. Of course there is a chance you will stand on something sharp! But because you are barefoot (and your senses are heightened) you are much more aware of the surface of the floor in front of you.

The more you barefoot walk, the more you train the nerve endings in your feet about what ‘pain’ feels like, you develop a resilience in the feet and your feet become sturdier. I’ve been barefoot walking for years and have not had an injury yet. The chances of picking up something horrible through your feet are so slim this point only deserves one sentence! You won’t lick your feet after you’ve barefoot walked and you’ll be watching where you are going. You’ll be fine!

I encourage you all to take your shoes and socks off, find some grass, soft mud or sand to start with and just give it a go! Send me photo! If you’re in Yorkshire you’d be very welcome to join us
at our monthly Barefoot Club or maybe you’d like to walk the Dales Way barefoot with us later in 2017!

You can find out more about my ecotherapy work at
www.hayleygillard.com and www.wildgoosecic.co.uk and connect with me on social media using the links below:

www.facebook.com/iamhayleygillard
​
www.instagram.com/iamhayleygillard

www.twitter.com/hayleygillard1
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Don’t Worry About Me. Care For Me

10/1/2016

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Here's my 5* book review of "High Tide, Low Tide: The Caring Friend's Guide To Bipolar Disorder," written by Martin Baker and Fran Houston, published by Nordland Publishing, on October 1st. 
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The story behind High Tide, Low Tide, and how it came to be written is every bit as remarkable as the book itself.

The authors, Martin Baker and Fran Houston met online in May 2011. At the time Fran was living on an island in Maine, USA, and Martin in Newcastle upon Tyne in the North of England. Fran suffers from chronic fatigue syndrome, fibromyalgia and bipolar disorder, and now, in a way, Martin is a long distance carer – in that he cares about her. His caring shines through in the easy, flowing writing style, as he tells the moving and powerful story, taking us into Fran’s world of bipolar, in particular.

And that’s what makes this story so remarkable – the fact that Fran lives in the USA and Martin is in England.

It’s a story that simply had to be told; appealing, as it surely will, to every single person suffering from bipolar, to every single mental health carer, and to everyone who has absolutely no connection with, or an interest in, this completely misunderstood and feared ailment.   

The reason why? Because it’s a human story told told in human terms, which skilfully sweeps aside the dark myths surrounding bipolar.

High Tide, Low Tide is well structured, well written, and, even though I’m a veteran mental health campaigner, had me thinking long and hard about how people suffering from bipolar actually live with it.

My only slight quibble, and this is a purely personal point of view, is that the introductory explanations run to too many mini sections - with titles such as Preface, Introduction, Why This Book Is Different , Key Messages, and Perspective and Language – before we get to the real meat. But that meat, when we start to devour it, is filet mignon all the way, and fully deserves the five stars I’ve given it.

I was particularly taken with an early comment from Fran: “Don’t worry about me, care for me,” which Martin says is one of the first things he remembers Fran telling him, and he feels it is as relevant today as it was then.

Structured in three principal sections: “Be Who You Are,” “Do What You Can,” and “Embrace The Journey,” each one contains a number of solid gold nuggets of wisdom, which truly mean something to people involved with bipolar – either as sufferers, or as carers. Such as “Care but Don’t Crowd. Share but Don’t Pollute,” “Being A Haven,” and “Wellness and Illness.” By its very nature bipolar, with its episode of mania and depression, has both positive and negative implications, and these are explored accurately and skilfully, and above all, show the human costs of the ailment.

Exploring what bipolar is and what causes it, we are taken on a journey almost into Fran’s mind, looking at what bipolar “labels” mean and don’t mean to her…along with the physical symptoms of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and Fibromyalgia.  

This may all sound dark and depressing. But it isn’t. This is a book about friendship, overcoming adversity and the incredible long distance relationship between two truly extraordinary people. It’s well documented, well researched, and contains important source material and contacts for anyone needing assistance with the subject matter which is so often misunderstood.

I was honoured to be given a free pdf copy of this remarkable book for my review. Overall, the unique relationship between Fran and Martin makes fascinating and moving reading. Five stars for every single aspect of it.  

Buy "High Tide, Low Tide: The Caring Friend's Guide To Bipolar Disorder" on Amazon UK:  
https://www.amazon.co.uk/High-Tide-Low-Friends-Disorder/dp/8283310216 
and on Amazon, in The States:
https://www.amazon.com/High-Tide-Low-Friends-Disorder/dp/8283310216

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    Stewart Bint supports mental health charity Lamp Advocacy.

    Click here to donate
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    Author

    Stewart Bint is a novelist, magazine columnist and PR writer. 

    He lives with his wife, Sue, in Leicestershire in the UK, and has two children, Christopher and Charlotte, and a budgie called Sparky.

    Usually goes barefoot.

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